I have to confess. I love my children unconditionally and sometimes I think that maybe I am rowing the parenting boat in the wrong direction. I can’t help it. They want something and I want to give them that something that they want so badly. So am I spoiling them? Does that mean that I fail as a parent? A couple of days ago a friend pointed out to me that the reason my kids are way demanding is my willingness to shower them with my unrestricted love. So I couldn’t help but look online what the researchers think and here’s what I found: there are two distinct things that can happen. These are discussed below:
Too Much Love Can Destroy The Limits
As a parent, it is our responsibility to make sure that our kids know their limits and do not try to break the domestic rules no matter what. A growing body of research suggests that too much parental affection can destroy the limits you establish over time, usually struggle to make kids follow a certain rule and if children fail to abide a certain rule, it can really freak parents out. Why? Because in order to discipline children, it is important to draw a line somewhere and when you become too frank with children, they begin to think that it’s ok to cross the limits.
Affection Help Kids Feel Safe
On the other hand, affection let’s kids feel like they are safe. The world can be a cold place and by showering too much affection on your kid, you might be ruining him. I know what you must be thinking: “so should I not love my kid the way I do?” Who will love him, if I don’t?” As a parent, I can imagine the bundles of love that we want to give to our children, but we cannot let them go off the leash. They are children after all. They need rules, they need discipline in order to be productive individuals of this society. Discipline is not only necessary for their overall growth, but is also crucial for their academic success.
So What Can We Do?
The best thing for us to do is to find a balance between things. We can’t keep ourselves from loving our children and we can’t just let them be on their own. We can’t teach our kids everything. Playgrounds and outdoor playground equipment play an important role in teaching kids the manners that they need to learn. I usually do not let my children out of my sight because I am a fanatic parent who believes that she needs to protect her kids and playgrounds and the commercial playground equipment may not prove healthy for the kid. But boy am I wrong. I can’t shield my kids from everything, so I need to let go a little. This does not mean that I will love them less; it just means that I will love them while I let them grow without my parental shadow constantly hovering above their heads.